quote of the whenever

“Home is behind, the world ahead” – Edge of night, LotR song

Wednesday, July 8, 2015

Jurassic World Review

Hello! So, I also saw inside out, so I'll have to review that too. But first, Jurassic World.

Plot: After however many deaths from Jurassic Park, they closed it down. And reopened it. As Jurassic World (the name is different, so hopefully the customers won't relate this new park to the countless deaths that happened at the old park ON THE SAME FREAKIN SITE YOU IDJITS!!!). But, with only fourteen different species of REAL LIVE DINOSOARS, people are bored. Because giant killing machines that only exist at one place in the entire universe get boring after 20 years. Lllaaaammmmeeee. So they genetically engineer a super dangerous, super smart, super pissed off killing machine. (It's for a good cause, really! Money, the best motivation) Then the SDSSSPOKM (super dangerous super smart super pissed off killing machine.... SDSSSPOKM doesn't have a ring to it though.... I'm gonna call him Rexie) gets out and kills a bunch of people. They get raptor trainor Starlord... Wait, crap I mean Chris Pratt (I forgot his name in the movie) to fight it, along with the stupid chick who created it for a spike in attendance and prices and her two nephews who visited the island and got stuck where Killer Rexie was chillin out, hunting. They fight Rexie, people die, stuff happens, characters get off the island and the camera zooms around the island showing how majestic and beautiful these dangerous killers are.

Thoughts: It was amazing. I loved it. Although the chick was dumber than a bag of rocks and there was a dude who was like "I have to stay behind to help people!" and he helped people but it neither showed him dying nor did it show him get off the island. I basically just want to know what happened to him. Other than those few flaws, good movie, lots of death, and DINOSOARS FIGHTING DINOSOARS!!! There is nothing I like better than dinosaurs fighting each other. I like it even better than them attacking the annoying characters. So... it was pretty epic. The only thing that doesn't make sense (okay, a lot probably doesn't, but the big issue...) REALLY?!?! YOUR ENTIRE PLOT HINGES ON "PEOPLE GOT BORED OF DINOSOARS AFTER 20 YEARS?! THE ONLY PLACE IN THE WORLD WITH DINOSOARS?! Dude, it's like a zoo, or Disney land. People don't get bored of Disney land. Just because there aren't new animals every year doesn't mean that people stop going to zoos. So why is it that the ONLY dinosaur park IN THE WORLD bores people? Like, WHAT?!

Rating: 5/5. It was good.

Raptor Trainer

For the first time in sooo long.... INVERTED PYRAMID!!!